It's been one year
One year without you ❤️
Mom it’s been a year, hope you are smiling wherever you are
This month it was one year ago since my mom died. It’s been a crazy year. The first months were just surreal, waking up each morning hoping that it was just a real bad nightmare and so many practical things that had to be sorted out. Cried myself to sleep over and over, woke up in the middle of the night and hoped everything was like it used to be. Summer came and I began to feel good but at the same time weird or even wrong - because I felt like I shouldn’t feel this “good” so soon after her passing. Then fall and winter came and I hit rock bottom hard with supersonic speed, ending the year confused, sad, stressed and burnt out, on the edge of a sick leave from work.
Now it’s been one year. It’s strange but I’m feeling better than ever. I’m excited for what the future holds, I have a postive mindset and I’m walking up every day with a smile on my face. Even though I still feel that’s it’s weird to say, I am truly happy.
I miss you every single day mom, I miss seeing your smile mom, I miss giving you a hug mom, I miss hearing your voice mom, I miss talking about everything and nothing mom, I miss being able to call you and hear about your day and tell you about my day mom, I miss swinging by your apartment for a dinner or coffee mom, I miss taking a walk with you in the park, I miss you every single day mom. ❤️
Food & Coffee
At the beginning of the month I took a coffee course at Coffee Colletive (the place I also by my coffee beans from) and learned quite a lot about what goes into the brewing, what can affect your brew and much more, I’ve been practising a lot since and I’m finally beginning to see and taste improvements in my coffee but I still need to practice especially on my milk foaming so I’ve convinced one of my colleagues a former barista to come by and give a private course next month. I made a second try on baking croissants but I somehow fucked up, I already knew it after the kneading but I choose to continue, I should just have made a new dough but I didn’t, they were ugly and didn’t tast that good. Hopefully next time will be better.
Not giving a fuck about engangement
Changing your creative style defiantly comes at a price - well sort of. Over the last few month I have begun my transition into more street photography, a bit of food and hopefully soon some more lifestyle. I knew from the beginning that I would get hit on engagement and people - my followers, properly wouldn’t like or at least have to get used to my new style or unfollow me. That’s fine, no hard feelings. I have changed my style because I was tired of shooting the classic shots, I’m tired of shooting what I know my followers wants to see, I’m tired of shooting the things I know will get a lot of likes. I’m changing my style because I want to challenge myself, I want to shoot what I actually like and is passionate about.
I use way to much time on Instagram, but it's there I get inspired and motivated to do better and leave my comfort zone. So I've put together a little list of photographers or photos that inspires me or are just acing it at the moment. This section of the blog will be a monthly recurring, and I'll share some of the Photographers/instagrammers that inspired me during the month. If you have any suggestions, please comment below or slide into my DM’s on instagram.
March have been pure awesome and I can’t wait to continue smiling to the world. April will be quite exciting on a personal level but more on that in my next post.
Thanks for reading this far!